Thanksgiving

The holiday was a lot fun. While I was lounging around after a huge meal, friends began to send pictures that might interest me. I found some that interested me and I am going to share them. Enjoy.

 

 

 

Playing with a Dead Fish

 

http://shaved2thebone.blogspot.com



Hopefully your reaction was “EEEWWWW”. That was what I wanted. In this post, I am going to discuss an issue that comes up a lot in BDSM play. The issue is a submissive that tries to not show pain.

I have to admit that I was guilty of this when I first came out in leather. My thinking was that I was proving my manhood but not responding. Unfortunately, it could not be farther from the truth.

Let’s face it; most men were raised to not show pain. “Big boys don’t cry,” was heard in my family a lot. When I joined the Marine Corps, we were told that pain is weakness leaving the body. When a politician cries on National television, people question his manhood and his ability to lead. It is understandable that when men submissives start out in the BDSM community, the might true to suffer through the pain.

There are a few Tops out there that do enjoy when a boy does that. They don’t resemble most Tops but that is what they like. As a Top, I am aggravated by a submissive that does this with me. I mentor them and try to explain why most Tops do not like a submissive to be stoic. The reason I dislike it is that it takes away the reason I Top. I am turned on by the grunts and groans of a boy I am putting through his paces. I am also able to gauge where the submissive is on the pain scale. It also helps me to know if he is enjoying it.

In the cause of transparency, I have to say that I was guilty of this for a few years as a submissive. I finally had a Top, one of the four Tops, tell me that it was annoying him. He told me that if he gave me three licks and I didn’t respond to any of them then that would be the last time we played. He was not asking for me to fake it like some actors in leather porn. He wanted real, personal reactions to what he was doing to me. I realized that I hated it when submissives did it to me but I was doing the same to those men that top me.

If you are one of the men that fight the pain, decide if it is getting you what you want. If not, change. I can say for myself that giving that feedback has made my play more enjoyable and has allowed me to take things I would have thought impossible.